“Planet Earth contains extraordinary beauty. Also contains two-legged black holes of doom and gloom. Recommend emotional shields and human repellent spray at all times.”
Dr. Zuuunix
Galactic Federation | Anthropologist
The Gloom Merchant™ Human Repellent Spray
$19.95 USD
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The Gloom Merchant™ Human Repellent Spray
$19.95 USD
Buy More & Save 50% Off on Each Additional Single Unit
No More Gloom & Doom!
People Suck™ Gloom Merchant™ Human Repellent Spray deflects unnecessary panic. Preserves optimism. One spray creates an invisible barrier that discourages worst-case scenarios, unsolicited disaster predictions, and emotionally exhausting “just being realistic” commentary.
Product Details
Deflect Unnecessary Panic!
Formulated to Repel People Who:
- Open conversations with breaking bad news
- Turn minor setback into apocalypses
-
Predict world collapse before coffee
Encourages:
- Calm
- Forward thinking
-
Peace over panic
THE PERFECT FUNNY GIFT FOR ANYONE WHO NEEDS A GOOD LAUGH FROM ALL GLOOM MERCHANTS. REPEL UNNECESSARY PANIC. SPRAY RESPONSIBLY.
No more gloom & doom! Deflect unnecessary panic! Preserve optimism!
Hilarious collection gift packs for all special occasions!
People Suck™ Urban Decay Collection
Take your gift giving to the next level. Save humanity with our People Suck™ Urban Decay Collection!
4 Piece Collection Includes:
- Not Today, Karen™ Spray the Crazy Away!
- Toxic Mansplainer™ Repels Condescension!
- Not Another Influencer™ No More Selfies!
- Gloom Merchant™ No More Gloom & Doom!
People Suck™ Energy Vampires Collection
Take your gift giving to the next level. Keep your sanity, protect your personal space with our People Suck™ Energy Vampires Collection!
4 Piece Collection Includes:
- Family Member Detoxifier™ Spray the Negativity Away!
- EX-Exterminator™ Spray the Past Away!
- Chronic Complainer™ No More Whining!
- The Know-It-All™ Repels Narcissism!
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